Shannon’s Soapbox: New GOP Math: 7 Is the New 18, But Only If You're Poor
House Republicans have taken insane steps to redefine who counts as a "dependent child" under SNAP, and surprise, it’s not your second grader. According to their newly passed 1,116-page manifesto, laughably dubbed the "One Big Beautiful Bill Act," your kid hits seven and suddenly becomes an independent adult in the eyes of the federal government. Parents, you're on your own. Hope that seven-year-old has a job lined up.
In the latest masterclass on how to kick people while they’re down, this bill strips away SNAP work requirement exemptions for parents unless their child is under seven. That’s right, forget the reality that raising kids is a full-time job. Lawmakers have decided that if your kid is old enough to tie their shoes, you’d better clock in or marry someone who already has.
Oh, and single parents? Sorry, you’re not invited to this fantasy version of the 1950s. Unless you’re married and living with someone who meets the new work requirements, you’re out of luck.
Not satisfied with just going after parents, the bill also tells older adults they’re not done working either. The age cap for work requirements jumps from 54 to 64. Who needs retirement when you can spend your golden years fighting for food assistance?
Of course, this assault on working families is wrapped inside a shiny $4.5 trillion tax cut package that hands out goodies to the wealthiest Americans like it’s Christmas morning. Expanded Trump-era tax breaks, bigger deductions, and more credits for those who already have accountants on speed dial.
To pay for it all, the bill proposes gutting Medicaid and SNAP to the tune of $1 trillion. And yes, the Congressional Budget Office says this will balloon the national debt by $3.8 trillion over the next decade. But who cares about debt when you’ve got missile defense systems and border walls to build?
Also included: $150 billion for something called the "Golden Dome" missile defense system, because clearly, that’s more urgent than feeding kids. Another $70 billion goes to border security. And while we’re at it, let's make student debt worse by killing off income-based repayment and ending subsidized loans for undergrads. Because guess what, this administration wants uneducated, good little worker bees.
The bill now heads to the Senate, where they’ll either rubber-stamp it or try to polish it up. But the message is loud and clear: if you’re not rich, married, or retired with a job, this bill is not for you.
